“I can imagine Jesus gathering a group of angels. ‘Who among you has over 200 years of humbling experience? You two, I have an assignment for you. Her name is Julie.’”
The first time I gave my testimony at church in April 2015, I shared this scenario.
Unsure of how, Holy Spirit had by that time taught me to hush all the things I knew in my own right. I had a Master’s degree, you know, but He seemed to care very little about that.
Head knowledge combined with persistent perfectionism screams pride.
It was a challenge for me to walk into Sunday school classes, conferences, and even conversations with brothers or sisters. I had little knowledge of the Bible. It was such a thick book of truth, packed with dynamic people who at one time walked the earth, stories full of wisdom and His glory.
How would I ever learn enough?
How would I ever absorb His entire Bible fast enough?
Learn enough for whom?
Fast enough for whom?
Caught red-handed yet again by His Spirit … I was worried about how I looked among Christians, feared their lack of acceptance if I didn’t know enough.
When I finally turned my gaze to His Holy Throne and sat still in prayer over and over, I heard nothing about speed-reading the Bible or performing great prophetic speeches for the masses.
I received the great gift of seeing my Jesus through the eyes of a child.
Teach me, Lord, the way of your decrees,
That I may follow it to the end
Give me understanding, so that I may keep your law and obey it with all my heart
Direct me in the path of your commands, for there I find delight
Turn my heart toward your statutes and not toward selfish gain
Turn my eyes from worthless things, preserve my life according to your word
Now the psalmist is an adult who presumably has life experience, knowledge of Scripture, etc.
Yet, every line is asking God to help as if he knows nothing:
“Give me understanding”
“Turn my heart” x2
Shall we empty ourselves of pride, foolish and hypocritical reminiscent of the Pharisees?
Shall we approach His Holy Throne with open hearts to receive the wisdom and direction from Most High, just as a child approaches her teacher with an unassuming question and the firm belief the teacher has the answer?
Our heart is the place of becoming. Holy Spirit may whisper in our ears, but He is shaving impurities, testing shadows, and raising our weak hearts to be seated with Christ.
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God (Matthew 5:8).
It is gracefully simple.
Let us rest there as He draws us ever near, replacing the need to know with the need to breathe in the vastness of Christ.
Happy Tuesday and welcome!
‘On Becoming’ is a short series. Next up will be On Becoming Fearless. My disclaimer on all in this series is that I have not fully become in any area. However, the transformative power of Jesus is evident in me and in all those who receive His amazing grace with an open heart. How about you? Have you noticed changes in yourself as a result of knowing God?
All photos in this post are from Pixabay.
There is a new poem “An Angel in Autumn” at https://faithhopeandpoetry.blog
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Have a beauty-full day.